Halloween is the holiday for all things spooky and scary. Haunted houses, horror flicks and decorations that make you jump in your skin are just a few of the ways we celebrate the season. But like every other holiday, it’s also a time to come together. And wouldn’t you rather make your loved ones laugh than make them jump? Here are some top tier corny jokes that you can pull out at your Halloween shindig, trick-or-treating, or throughout the day. These jokes are guaranteed to fill the room with ghosts – because when you tell them, everyone will be moaning, groaning, or going BOOOOO.
Good Halloween jokes for adults
These jokes are perfect for the office, or your grown-up Halloween party. While they are still PG-rated, they are better suited for an older audience.
Q: Why don’t vampires get invited to parties? A: They’re a pain in the neck.
Q: Why did the ghost go to the bar? A: For the boos.
Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers? A: No, they like to eat the fingers separately.
Q: Why don’t mummies take time off from work? A: They don’t want to unwind.
Q: What do you call an avant garde jack-o’-lantern? A: Way ahead of the carve.
Q: What are two witches living together called? A: Broommates.
Q: What’s a mummy’s favorite type of music? A: Wrap.
Q: Why don’t skeletons have fun at parties? A: They have no-body to dance with.
Q: What kind of monster loves disco music? A: The boogieman.
Q: Where do deviled eggs come from? A: Evil hens.
See also: Best Halloween Films To Watch While Pumpkin Carving
Halloween jokes for kids
These jokes are perfect to tell while taking the little ones out trick-or-treating, or if some small vampires and mummies show up at your door.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Witch. Witch who? Gesundheit.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Been waiting for candy all day.
Q: Where do ghosts buy stamps? A: At the ghost office.
Q: What did the skeleton bring to the barbecue? A: Spare ribs.
Q: Why did the zombie miss school? A: Because he felt rotten.
Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a yeti? A: Frostbite.
Q: What is a skeleton’s favourite instrument? A: The trom-bone.
Q: What’s a witch’s favourite subject in school? A: Spelling.
Q: How does a scarecrow drink his soda? A: With a straw.
Q: Where do zombies like to travel for vacation? A: The Dead Sea.
Clever Halloween jokes
These are some jokes that have a bit of a clever edge to them. Pull one of these out of your pocket, and you’re sure to impress.
Albert Einstein was a genius… but his brother Frank was a monster!
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Fangs. Fangs who? Fangs for letting me in!
Q: What happened to the man who missed his payments to his exorcist? A: He got repossessed.
Q: Why do demons and ghouls spend time together? A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend!
Q: Why do werewolves always show up late? A: Because they’re not when-wolves.
Q: When is it bad luck to cross paths with a black cat? A: When you’re a mouse.
Q: What did the pumpkin say to the person carving it? A: Cut it out.
Q: How do you buy something on the dark web? A: With crypt-ocurrency.
Q: What did the vampire say to his hangry friend? A: Don’t B-negative. Look for more positive.
Q: Why did the headless horseman work hard at his job? A: He wanted to get ahead in life.
See also: How To Celebrate Halloween For More Than One Evening
